Not every man has the charisma of Joey Tribianni whose upfront pickup line “How you doin’?† unfailingly charmed the ladies. Some need to rely on indirect measures in pursuit of a potential relationship. Here are some pointers for the apprehensive, introverted or misguided men.
– Get to know each other, without necessarily signaling too much romantic interest. Coming on too strong and walking right up to her can exhibit intensity that can be a potential put off. Learn her name, what she likes to do and who her friends are before going further.
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– Talk to your mutual friends or co-workers, to find out useful information like her relationship status and learn more about her. They might even know whether she is interested in you. Say something flattering such as “She’s a smart and classy girl.” They are to likely mention what you said to others, and it will get back to the girl.
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– Invite her to an event through her friends or mutual friends if possible. While this won’t result in a formal or traditional one-on-one date, but will definitely help you get to know each other better without the pressure of being alone, it can show that you are interested in her but might be a little shy. Whether or not she shows up will indicate her interest.
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– Tell her about an exciting new band playing soon, a movie coming out, the opening of an art exhibit or other upcoming event. If she signals that she is interested in that event, tell her when you are going and suggest that she come along. While this is not a cutting-edge maneuver, it prevents the chances of rejection, as you are still going without her; however, it does signal that you like being around her and want to spend more time with her.
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– Prepare for rejection. Some girls don’t like the indirect route. Also, she might just not want to date or could have other engagements. If you ask her out more than once and she declines give up and move on. No matter how suavely or indirectly you ask her out, she will be fairly direct in signaling her desire to go out with you.